Episode 78: Comedy, Creative Partnerships & Real Housewives Joy | Casey Wilson & Danielle Schneider | Bitch Sesh Podcast
Casey Wilson and Danielle Schneider are the co-hosts of Bitch Sesh: A Real Housewives Breakdown and two of the most versatile creatives in comedy. They’ve starred in hit shows like Black Monday, Marry Me, and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and written for everything from Bride Wars to Saturday Night Live. As actors, writers, producers, directors, and comedians, they’ve built careers fueled by collaboration, friendship, and a willingness to embrace the ridiculous. They share how meeting at UCB Theater set the stage for years of creative partnership, why having a trusted collaborator changes everything, and the importance of saying yes to what makes you happy. From the behind-the-scenes magic of Bitch Sesh to their advice on celebrating wins and expecting miracles, Casey and Danielle prove that joy, humor, and community are essential to making great work, and loving the process.
“When I was an exec assistant, I had an assistant. That was a bold move. Delegate.”
“What is the thing I’m good at that will also make me happy? It truly has to make you happy otherwise, don’t fucking do it”
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June Diane Raphael = CRW creative partner
Dannah Feinglass = DCS creative partner
Paul Scheer
Louisville, KY
Lauren Vanderkam
Before Breakfast Podcast
Marianne Williamson
Sally Fields
Soapdish
Sherman Oaks Galleria
Shania Twain -
Follow along using the Transcript
Chapters
00:00 Meet Casey Wilson & Danielle Schneider
03:25 How They Met at UCB Theater
07:50 Building a Comedy Career Together
12:15 The Origin of Bitch Sesh
16:40 Writing for Film and TV, from Bride Wars to Black Monday
21:00 Creative Partnerships That Last
25:30 Why Real Housewives Joy is Real Joy
29:45 Balancing Acting, Writing, and Producing
34:20 The Power of Saying No
38:55 Advice for Handling Setbacks
42:10 The Role of Humor in Resilience
46:40 Celebrating Wins and Expecting Miracles
50:30 Projects on the Horizon
She texted me and she's like, Hey, do you, you wanna do a podcast for like a month or something where we talk about, you know, it's the new season of Real Households, Beverly Hills. Let's just talk about it to ourselves and our friends. And no one will listen. No
one will listen.
Luckily Paul Sheer had said like, I'll put you in the feed for our very successful podcast.
How did this get made? Which was so generous of them, and because of that it started to just kind of take off.
That's Casey Wilson and Daniel Schneider, and this is The Powerful Ladies Podcast.
Hey guys, I'm your host, Kara Duffy, and this is The Powerful Ladies Podcast where I invite my favorite humans, the awesome, the up to something, and the extraordinary to come and share their story. I hope that you'll be left, entertained, inspired, and moved to take action towards living your most powerful life.
You've seen today's guest, Casey Wilson and Daniel Schneider, co-hosts of the podcast, bitch Sush, a Real Housewives breakdown, and as actresses on many of your favorite TV shows and movies, including starring most recently in Black Mondays playing Tiff and Deb, you've also seen their incredible work as writers, producers, comedians, directors, and showrunners.
Literally all of your favorite TV shows and movies have a credit given to them. From Bride Wars Saturday Night Live the league. Marry Me Blackish, how I met your mother, Beverly Hills Chihuahua two, and of course hot Wives. Forget Kevin Mac. Everyone in Hollywood is one degree away from Casey and Danielle.
Get ready to laugh out loud as we discuss the power of having a creative partner. They each have two. Why Real Housewives cures everything and how powerful ladies support each other to the grave, all that and so much more coming up. But first. Being an entrepreneur or a small business owner is hard, but the good news is it's much easier when you have a coach and a community.
The Powerful Ladies online community gives you both. It's where powerful ladies and powerful entrepreneurs from around the world discover clarity, produce results, and experience success at new levels. Because together we thrive as a member, you get access to master a new skill for business every month.
Network, brainstorm and collaborate with like-minded women. Get access to powerful ladies events, our library resources and more. Participate in group coaching and workshops led by a multi entrepreneur business coach. And you get the accountability and inspiration to stay on track and make it happen.
Join today@thepowerfulladies.com.
Well, oh my goodness, ladies, welcome to the Powerful Ladies Podcast. Thank you for having us. We're feeling very powerful. Hello. Hello. Well, I am so glad that we finally made this happen. Um, this is very common, right? This whole show is powerful ladies who are awesome and up to something and busy and basically don't know how we actually juggle all the things we do.
So it's so common to be like, um, and reschedule and move and what we got here. That's what's important. Um, we got here. I don't have ever
not had to reschedule everything.
Right. Like your whole life.
Like, okay, that's the date that it's scheduled, it's gonna happen. I don't remember that in the recent history of my life.
No, not at all. Not at all. Um, I would love to begin by, uh, telling the audience who you are and what you're up to, and we'll just start there.
Mm-hmm.
Great. Mm-hmm. Danielle?
Me meeting. Oh, sure. Mm-hmm. I was like, sure. I'd love to hear what I'm up to. Um, hi, I am Danielle Schneider. Um, I, so we
introduce each other.
Oh, that's great. Yes. Okay.
That, that right there is Casey Rose Wilson, Katherine Rose Wilson Cas many names. She goes by many names for her many talents, she is a. Actress. Mm-hmm. Writer. Mm-hmm. Producer, director. Thank you. Podcaster, mother, wife, friend. Dear doer. Um, sexual being, sexual being. Um, and all around kickass human being and I love her to pieces.
Aw, thank you, Danielle. And Danielle's a friend.
Barely that, barely. Danielle, Caroline Schneider. Dale's from Atlanta and then Florida,
sadly
is a, well, first of all, wonderful sweet person. There is no nicer person in the world and she is an actress. A writer. Mm-hmm. A producer, a showrunner, maybe you've heard of Hot Wives of, of Orlando, and then Las Vegas.
A take on The Real Housewives, which she was the showrunner and creative creator of with her friend on a fine glass and written on so many series, maybe you've heard of, um. Uh, it's always sunny in Philadelphia. Mm-hmm. Black Monday marry me, a couple of which I've starred in which is blessed and blessed and a wonderful, wonderful person.
Hilarious, hilarious comedian and mother, wife. Yes. Sexual being that's
very, very sexual. Please. I wish you had started with that, but I don't wanna critique.
Yeah. We can't critique you, you end with the, with the best part, right? Mm-hmm. Yes, of course. The most meaningful part. Yeah. The thing that I
really feel like envelopes who I am as a being.
Yeah. And I'm gonna add one more hyphen if I may, to you or me before you begin to myself. Okay. Sorry. That exists during the quarantine, which is addict. And I don't make light. I, I am looking for a treatment center. I'm sure. No, I'm just kidding. I just, these are hard times right now, and I think we're all mm-hmm.
Clinging to. What we can.
Yeah, it's interesting because as Casey knows, I wasn't a big drinker before. Mostly my thing was antidepressants and, um, that that was my jam. But, um, but since the quarantine I have. Um, realize that I could keep up mm-hmm. And really, and keep it down and just have a, a Tumblr by my bedside anyway.
But you've also continued to lean into your anti-depression.
Oh yes. I go, as Casey says, when endow go up, up, up.
And, I'm sorry, you asked one question and we've gone on for Yes. Many, many. We're
powerful
women. Yes, you are. How did you guys meet each other? Because I've read that you, you know, you mentioned Al earlier, you guys both have like creative partners mm-hmm.
That are very, also very fancy, powerful ladies and then you have each other. So I would love to hear about you guys and your creative partners. And then also we, you guys squad partner.
Ah.
The farm team, the miners. Yeah. Call up league. Call up big ones. Can't come in. Color up. Oh
gosh. Where did we meet Danielle? Through the UCB Theater, the Upright Citizens Brigade.
I know you always tell a story how you saw me making out with my now husband.
That was my first image of Danielle. Well, first I, you had done standup, which was wonderful, and I was thinking, gosh, I don't know this person.
And I think you may have lived in LA at that point. Yes, I think, and I lived in New York and I was doing a, a two woman show with June. Diane, Rachel, who is my creative partner, and 18,
18 is squad.
She's the, the real money and gold and mm-hmm. Then I thought, gosh, this girl's so funny and you had such funny standup.
And then the next thing I know, you're backstage like Voraciously making out with your husband Matt Bester, who runs the UCB theater. So I thought, wow, scandal, I came to learn. You guys had been together for a long time, which also kind of like rattled me to my core, like how could we still manage to kiss each other?
Yeah. Like how could we manage to feel anything for each other, you know? And that was then I really got to know you when I moved to New York. And you and your creative. Oh yeah, I'm sorry. And you and your creative partner, Donna Fineas. Were doing a two woman show.
Yes.
And June and I were in the audience watching you two kind of like set up your show and do a tech.
And June and I watched you two work and the way you were so kind to each other, we turned to each other, we're both animals and we're like. Wow. We didn't know we could be friendly, kind bottle.
Yeah. Uh, so I think, and then we both love the housewives. Yeah. And we sort of bonded over that. I remember. I had heard about Casey because we were kind of always my husband who's theater, the UCB is like, was always kind of ta, you know, he was still trying to like run it from both coasts in some ways years ago.
And so he was always kind of telling me about the new talent or who was here. Mm-hmm. And he was like, these, these two women are really great. Everyone's talking about them. And, um, they came to town and we were supposed to share kind of a slot with you in June. And you know, I do think there's this tendency, or there was a tendency in.
Myself, um, to think like, oh my God, these other really funny, cool women are coming and they're so good, and what does that mean for me? You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Like, I think it used to feel to me like there's only one spot and that's the spot that's gonna get taken. Um, but I saw Casey and June and I was like.
They're so funny. They're so good, they're so smart. I just wanna be friends with them.
Mm-hmm. Like,
it sort of turned my head around in the sense of like, oh no, you can't beat 'em. Join them. You know what I, that's so nice. Don't even try. And, and it was one of the most rewarding, uh, things that have happened because.
Casey and her partner June, have become two of my very closest, uh, sister friends. Mm-hmm. And, um, so, so that's how I met them. But I saw them perform and I was like, they're stars. So gotta get in there orbit.
Well, and you guys have done so many amazing projects individually, together with your creative partners and.
You know, to now be on, you know, Dewey, creating, hosting the Bit Se Bitch SES podcast. Why did you pick a tongue twister for a name of your podcast? No, it's a regret.
It's a regret.
That's not good.
Um, what was it about Real Housewives that you were like. I know our next career path is talking about this show.
We have to tackle this important topic. Yes. We didn't
know, and true and truly strange fashion, like it's just something that bonded us. We like to talk about these hilarious women, like they were so funny and so big and mm-hmm. Older than most of the people you see on TV and not. As likable, you know, quote unquote as people you see on tv.
Oh, say we were just drawn to them and so we found ourselves like always just texting each other us and our other friends of just like how crazy this last episode was. It was like these were our weird friends that we could talk about behind their back and no one got hurt and. Then Casey, when she and, and Casey had, um, created a show called The Realist Real Housewives, where we all just like read from the text mm-hmm.
Of the
real, like the actual words of the housewives. And that had been really funny and gone over really well. And then when Casey had her first child, she texted me one day and she was kind of on maternity leave. Um, as you know, you know, as much as. As much as a woman can be. Mm-hmm. In today's world. Yeah.
And she texted me and she's like, Hey, do you, you wanna do a podcast for like a month or something where we talk about, you know, it's the new season of Real Hospitals, Beverly Hills. Let's just talk about it to ourselves and our friends. And no one will listen. No
one will listen,
no one will pay. Like, it'll just be us and like our three friends who we text and.
And then it sort of became like, it sort of luckily, um, Paul and June and Jason Zuka put us in their feed. Paul Sheer had said like, I'll put you in the feed for our very successful podcast. How did this get made? Which was so generous of them and because of that it started to just kind of take off.
Yeah, it
was great.
Well, I think that's, I, I would love to jump into what you guys think of the, the phrase powerful ladies, and then I wanna bring it back to, based on your definition of what a powerful lady is, how does that relate to the women, you know, in your day-to-day life versus the women on real housewives? The same.
Same. The exact same. Mm-hmm. Gosh, what a question. I mean, I'll say, you know. It's interesting because when I was thinking about doing your podcast and I was thinking of the title and kind of the notion of like, gosh, how did we get here? And I'll speak for myself, Danielle, but I do think, and, and this is certainly.
Kind of what's bubbling up in our world, not even bubbling like we are being confronted with in the world right now, which is this notion of like white privilege. And I think I have admittedly in the same way Danielle is saying like, you know, sometimes I'd be threatened by other women. Like I've kind of held onto this belief of like, I got here because of my hard work.
Mm-hmm. I'm like, I persevere and I finish things and I'm not. Afraid to, you know, put myself out there and I don't take No, and all of these things that, you know, are so valued in our society. And just recently, you know, I I, and just kind of being candid here, I've been doing this workbook about kind of, you know, my white privilege and my eyes are quite open to the fact that, you know, uh, my grandmother paid for college.
I didn't have to work a second job. I took an internship in a theater in Louisville, like a really great theater. I wasn't paid, but I was able to do it and, and so on and so forth, and so. In some ways, the only way, reason I'm saying this is because like, yes, do I have talent? I have a ton
in spades
in spade, there's no, no one can take that.
We can
quantify this, Casey, let's not try. Yeah. Like
I'm, I am, you know, so talented. But, but I will say I have found, at least in terms of where I've gotten it to be a combination of the two. And so I just wanna say that up top, but I think in a way like. When I see all my friends of all, you know, I do think at least the people we know, Danielle, I'll say like, they have a powerful, they are all powerful.
And I all, I think all moms are powerful. I think, I just think in today's world, every person and every woman is truly like trying their best to do Yeah. The most that they can. And so I just in general have such respect for like, our times are moving so fast. Yes. Yeah. I, so I don't even know if I'm answering your question, but.
I just generally feel in this day and age, like every woman is trying their best to do the best they can at everything, which is a big ask. Mm-hmm. That said, I'm incredibly powerful. Go on Danielle.
Yeah, I mean, Casey makes a good point. I, of course did everything myself. Nobody helped me. No. Um, no. I have been in incredibly lucky and fortunate and privileged beyond belief because I too have had help along the way in so many ways. Um, and becoming more and more aware of that in order to be quote unquote powerful.
Um. Both society and friends and spouses and coworkers, a lot of people have to lift you. Mm-hmm. And connect. You can. Yeah. You can't. Be it by yourself, but I will say, yeah. Oh yes.
No, I was just gonna say, and connections is a big thing I've been thinking about a lot lately because I've always kind of been like, oh, I naturally, like I'm social and I make connections with people.
But you have to kind of be put in those fears in order to have those connections. And again, I am likable, and again, we cannot quantify that.
A factor. Yeah. And,
and, and I think, you know, for anyone to succeed in any career, whatever it is, you do have to do the work and you have to be to be good at it. And I think, yeah. But yes, go on Danielle.
I was gonna also say just on that same thing, it's like, but being powerful is also really lifting others to, to be secure in yourself and realize that like a, a, a rising, you know, tide lifts all ships.
And that is something I've definitely, um, found out through my career.
Yeah.
Um, is that, uh, lifting other people lifts you?
Mm-hmm.
Um, help other people, befriend other people. Um, and so I think, and, and because of the people that have helped me. I have been able to help other people. Yeah. And so I think that that is, you know, being able to help others and show others the way.
And not that I couldn't be doing more, there's always more I can be doing and I, mm-hmm. I've been thinking about that. Definitely a lot more lately, like putting my, not having to be asked to help, but like reaching my hand to help. Yeah. Um, when no one's asked. But I do think, um, the more you can do that, the more powerful you are.
Yeah. One of our kind of sub slogans of powerful ladies is full circle empowerment. Mm-hmm. Right? Like, how does the boss lady help the woman rising? Who's helping the woman just looking for empowerment. And I think all of us know who have been in, you know, powerful lady boss lady situations, how inspired we can get from the woman who appears from our perspective to be starting at the bottom.
Like it's so inspiring and humbling to see like just how hard everyone is working in the hope and. I don't know where I'm going yet, but I'm going, yeah. And it's like, yes, we don't know what we're doing either. Come along. Mm mm-hmm. Yeah. And I think it's only a bit when you're older that you can say like, it's okay to not know where you're going because when you're tapping into you, you're just like, oh my God.
Like how is. Life going to amount to anything. How are these puzzle pieces gonna kind of come together? And the truth is, you know, I'm a definitely a spiritual person and I'm a, like everything happens for a reason person for good or bad. And I do think the path is kind of what your path is and. Questions that you have get answered kind of further down the road in a way.
Mm-hmm. But it doesn't ever help to tell anyone, this younger people, because you're like, no,
I have such a clear memory of being like, I wanna say 21 or 22, and being at this bar in the East Village case, you probably remember, and I think it was called like Nevada Smith.
Oh boy. Do you remember
that? Yeah.
It's like a real NYU hangout.
Yeah.
And. And like, you know, I, so I was so sure of myself. I was in college for acting like that's gonna be a huge success. And like, I just, you know, I had all this journey, like, of course I'm gonna be a Broadway star. Like mm-hmm. I had no roadmap or everything, but then like, I remember like getting kind of wasted and um.
And then having like this moment of clarity where I looked around and saw don't, as we always have when we're wasted, as we do when we're drunk, um, seeing all these friends and all these people from school that I was with and I was really like, oh, they have the same dream as me and not all of us are gonna make it, and none of us are gonna know how to do it.
And this is fucked. Being like, this is cra whatcha doing. Like why do you think you can do this? All these people love these dreams and they're so good and like mm-hmm. Who do you and you dunno how to do this. You dunno. Anybody in the business like, you're fucked. And being like, and like having that like moment and then it went away and I still just like moved forward in the direction.
I didn't know how I was gonna do it, but I just remember I have such a clear moment of like that, like panic.
Setting it. Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. And then if I could then see that person now, what was it, five years later? 'cause I'm, uh, 25. Yeah. Uh, is that like, oh, like, you know, like hopeful. You know, you worked hard and you were very lucky
and, and it is hard work.
I think, I think, you know, finishing things is harder than starting them. Yes. Yeah. Um, and finishers. I do think you, you are rewarded, you know? Mm-hmm. Every how long of people have big ideas, but yeah. And I think you have to be tough and I, I think my, like, not that you're asking totally, but like, my greatest advice to everyone, and again, this is something that is a, a luxury, but if you could beg, borrow, steal your way to get some therapy, I think at a young age, even because.
To keep yourself mentally and emotionally fit to me is how you kind of, mm-hmm. Don't put, throw your craziness on other people. You keep yourself kind of, I don't know, mental, just well enough. People wanna work with normal people. They wanna frankly be around people who are centered and I don't know. For me, everyone's always like, oh.
And I know this isn't about acting, but like, how do I get a part and how do I this and how do I audition and I'm always like, go to therapy and it, it tracks actually. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I just think the more kind of well you are, the more you attract Yeah. Great people around you and et cetera, et cetera. For sure.
And, and there's, I think what people. Like you need to be well on all levels because like you kind of mentioned, when you do start something, it looks like you have to just climb this one hill. You're like, it's right there. I can do it. And then you get up there and you realize, oh wait, there's another hill we're not done yet.
And like, I really think that's the part that no one talks enough about. Like, yeah, start. Just start and you're like, you're gonna get to the top and go, oh shit, we haven't even started yet. Keep going. Yeah. And so many
times where I'm like, I, because I used to waitress and um, for years, oh, mm-hmm. Oh my God, and hostess and all this stuff just longer than a human should and could physically do it.
But I did it for many, many years and I would get a job and be like, well, fuck you. I'm outta here. Bullshit. Job and it was like, and then that job would end and it was like, oh no, I have to go back to like, so many times I would think I'm like over the hump and I'm now starting my life. And it was always like, no, this is your life.
Like, and so then you just have to realize like, oh, like what do I wanna do? Like, mm-hmm. What you start to hone in and drill down on like, oh no, what is the thing I'm good at? That would also make me happy because I also think happiness. Finding happiness from what you do is so important because you're, you're not gonna get it from the outside, so it truly has to make you happy.
Otherwise, don't fucking do it.
Yeah. And, oh, go ahead. Go ahead. No, no, please. I was just gonna say, hearing you say like drilling down on what your kind of thing is and honing it is, I read this book about, God, it's called. I'm gonna get the amount of hours wrong. It's however many hours are in a week, what it's called, 40.
Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. If that's, or that's what you
think. Sure. Yeah. And, and this
woman did these time logs of, of a thousand women and women trying to just work and do it all and, and kind of finding more time, you know? Mm-hmm. Time is our most precious resource at the end of the day. And yeah, her advice, which I have taken is her name's Laura Vander Cam, and she does a podcast that I listen to, which is.
So nerdy it's called, um, before breakfast, which are like organizational tips for your life and how to kind of Right at my alley together makes me real excited. I literally, it's like an orgasm. I listen to. How to multitask in a way that actually works and how to mm-hmm. You know, create your schedule ahead of time.
It's amazing. But her whole thing is leaning into your, what she calls core competencies. Mm-hmm. Which is like, let things go that you are not good at. And it's not even about like. Yes, of course there's a a version of if you can afford to have someone do something for you, great. But it's more just like you don't need to spend time trying to learn X or just proving to yourself that you're good at something that you don't like or doesn't take your time.
It's like literally whittle your life down to family, friends, core competencies. Done. Yeah, and it is kind of freeing. It's like free, I'm gonna do just what I am good at. Yeah. I'm excellent at, and everything else is gone. Mm-hmm.
It's true because you, at some point in your life, you'll have to start saying no to things.
I think, especially as your job gets busier and becoming a parent really made me have to say no to things. Whole nother, I'm a person that has been conditioned to say yes to everything and anything, especially when it comes in the form of an opportunity.
Mm-hmm.
Um, because I wanna work. I'm a, I'm a workhorse and that is for sure.
But nothing's good if I can't. So I really had to just go like, even if it just takes my mental space, like not my physical space, but like that thing, that job, that audition, whatever, that's gonna take so much of my mental space. Like what do I wanna use that mental space for? Do I wanna be preparing for that thing, or do I just wanna have that time with my daughter and connect with her, or, you know what I mean?
And so like, but saying no is hard. So, so it is like drilling down on like, what do, what's gonna make me happy? What's essential? Yes.
Mm-hmm. Yeah, no, as when I'm working with clients, I'm a business coach in addition to doing running Powerful ladies and, um, all the time, like business owners come to me and they're like, I have this dream.
It's not working. We're not, and I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like, how are you spending your time? Mm-hmm. Most people are. Built, they built a beautiful company and then put themselves in their least favorite position. I'm like, why did you do that? Oh, that's so interesting. Yeah. And I'm No, no, no, no, no. Like, let's delegate.
What do you actually wanna do? And people seem to be so afraid to like follow the path of fun because we totally separated that that success and abundance can be related to fun. And I mean, that's another dialogue that I would love to see pivot. But um mm-hmm. I mean, when I look at the work that you guys have done, it seems like from the outside looking in, it's like, Ooh, that looks fun.
They're fun, and like you kind of keep following this breadcrumb of fun. Is that how it occurred to you in the moment, or is that. Y you know, is that in hindsight that you can kind of see where you led, followed? What seemed more fun, I'll say about this
podcast that Casey and I do. Mm-hmm. Like that is to me, pure fun.
Yeah. Mm-hmm. Like it, it's something we, and not that we don't work hard, we work our butts off. We wanna make a good show. And so we are always trying to try new things and do fun things and watch a lot of reality and all the stuff. Yeah. Which does take time. Um. But I have so much fun doing that. It's so stupid.
It's so stupid, and, but it is, nothing is more fun. So when, when you talk about like do your passion or whatever, like I did not see this part being something that we could actually do and. And make a living doing this and stuff like that. Yes, because
I'm, I'm echoing you only to say that I have worked on projects that have taken me five years that never come to fruition, or that I spend every second and they're so difficult and I follow it up the hill and I write the screenplay.
That never goes anywhere, or I, I do these, these things that. Take my, and I'm like, I'm not having fun. I hate this. Then we do something that is so purely fun that we were gonna do for one month. That honestly has been one of the, the biggest things I've ever done, and who could have known that? But it did start from like, let's just have fun.
Let's do something that we're not getting noted on by men at, you know, a network telling us what they
think
is
what they gonna work, what we think is funny.
Mm-hmm. And it, it, it's been such freedom and, and just. Yeah, following the fun. And to go back quickly to your point about delegating, I'm gonna say something that is.
A lot of people find very wild, which is that brace yourselves. I was an assistant for many years. That was my job of kind of like a personal assistant in New York. Mm-hmm. And I had an assistant while I was an assistant. Yes. That is an Oprah boss move right there. That's what that is. Mm-hmm. I'll just let that, let that sit and let everybody soak that one up.
It's
bold. It's, but you know what got you, where you're
got got, Hey baby, why, why would it have, because I have not only, not only weaknesses in the, or in the area of, of organization, like beyond weaknesses. Like it is so not my thing. And I started to realize, at least for my career, you think it's all about like acting and writing and doing your creativity.
And I realized, oh my God, no. Mm-hmm. There's a whole business side to this that I. I, I mean, you saw how long I struggled to even like be recorded on this podcast because I don't understand these things, and I realized like, I need help. And that's the other thing is I will say for myself, I am always open to asking for help.
If I don't know something, boom. I say, I need help, someone help me. Like, and I seek it out and I'm never gonna pretend I know something. I don't know. I'm just like, someone help me. And I. We'll move from there, but I have no ego about that. I feel like that's the only way forward, and there's so much we don't know.
Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's, it's the same reason why having a don't list is as, as important as having a to-do list. Right. Ooh, that's a don't list. Oh. All the things you're not gonna do either, because as you said earlier, they're not in your strengths or. It's completely unnecessary. Like it takes, um, you away from all the things that you're really here to be a contribution for.
Can I hear some don'ts? Oh, yeah. Uh, well, like doing LA your own laundry or cleaning your house, like easy don'ts your own, um. Your own yard work. Um, it can really be anything that you can come up with. And like, people always think it's like, especially if they're a small business, like how can I not do all the things?
I'm like, just like you, you had a, an assistant. As an assistant. It's like if you can pay someone less than you can make in an hour doing something else instead, why would you keep doing it? Mm-hmm. Like just mathematically doesn't make sense. And also I think like there can be emotional don't, which is like, I don't make one plan on a Sunday night.
Mm-hmm. I'm with my kids. That's it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I like this. Yeah, me too. It can be people. It can be, you know. Oh, people. People.
Oh, I got some don'ts.
I got some, I got
some
real don'ts. I got a lot of Don't. Right on this zoom, I got some don'ts. Yeah. I'm seeing a couple don'ts on this Zoom. Kidding. You're all dues.
You're all dues.
Big old dues.
I feel like that's a card I wanna hand out to people. Like, don't even talk to me. Here's your dunk card. Like, Don,
don't. No, don't, don't start. That's what my daughter, you know, little kids do that the best. I remember my daughter, like when just an adult was like too much for her, she'd just be like, no.
And it was so, and people were so like, you know, they would be like, ah. And she'd just be like, no.
Just like, what a hero.
I know. It was so like, I wish I had that so
unencumbered by social graces. No, she
still, to this day, she'll just be like, Nope.
She needs to teach a boundary stuff. So honor, she's never said that to me.
Oh, she loves
you. She sure loves you. Oh.
When you look at the women that you've risen with and the women who inspired you, um, along your path, how influential have women girlfriends and having those connections, especially within the industry, mean to you? Um, and what could you have done? Like if you didn't have those relationships, where do you think you would be otherwise?
Uh, I mean, my relationships have been everything.
Mm,
everything, every job I've gotten, every, uh, every way to act. Mm-hmm. How to be. I have gotten from other women, they have taught me how to be graceful, how to be thankful, how to be powerful, how to say no, how to stand up. 'cause I, I don't think that I do that naturally.
I think I'm, I'm a little more like, oh, I'll just do what you say. But I've looked at, uh, Casey and, and June and Jess, and. So many of our other good friends, um, and they have really, uh, taught me how to be.
Mm-hmm.
Um, and that's just in like my. Actor kind of community, but even in, just like the writing rooms I've been in mm-hmm.
I've looked at the women who aren't even older than me, like I'm talking about women who are younger than me, but I've just, they just have something about them that I look up to. Um, and I see that their path so clearly, or the way that they take charge or the way that they are afraid and still move forward.
Mm-hmm.
Um, I've just been so inspired. Like I feel like I've been taught everything. I'm like one of those. Animal or like nel in the woods, you know what I mean? Who like comes out and is just like, has to learn to like, speak like a, a human, like raised by wolves. Like that's what I felt like before. I had these examples of people like of ways to act and be, um, both as an artist and a person, because I don't know what happened in my growing years.
So, so nor was in the
woods, was now played by Jodie Foster or Claire Danes. I
mean, unclear. I think both. Right? Both. Okay. It's a dual role. Dual role. I literally can't remember. And I see
them both so vividly in the role. Yeah. I
mean they both could have been, but I believe it was Jody Foster, but it might as well have been.
But yes, I'd still be in the woods or in Florida, same difference. And not, and you know, be like, I don't know, I'd be working, I'd always be working. Mm-hmm. But I'd probably be like, I don't know, like doing one of those. Um, like jewelry things where you, like, it's kind of a pyramid scheme. Like, and I'd be on the top of the pyramid, I think, but I don't think I'd be very, I'd be in the middle of the pyramid.
Mm-hmm. I wouldn't be, you'd be on the top. No, I don't think so. I don't think I would've had the, the wherewithal. I, that's why. Without your
ladies. Yeah. I feel the same. Mm-hmm. I do, but you know, Danielle, you're like the best and the worst of Florida. And I'm staying silent, but all my family's from Florida too.
When you say you're from Florida, I like, I'm like, ba, ba, ba, ba. Meanwhile, everyone, um, I mean I was born in, in outside DC I like to say, but Virginia, but, um. I, I think Danielle, you're the best and worst of Florida. It's
true
and trashy, but in one person,
you know what that is? Me. It's true.
You're like classy, trashy.
Yeah, exactly. Like I will, I can't eat a fruit if it's like not from a can, but like,
but you're like also incredibly elegant.
Yeah, understated in my style. Mm-hmm. But then you'll see me in like a cutoff pair of jean shorts and like a fluorescent bikini top. And you're like, what's happening? Yeah. I'm like Florida.
I
have been like, Ooh, Florida showed up today. Yeah.
Like every once in a while, especially like at the beach, Florida like comes Yeah. At the
beach. I feel like that's when Florida takes hold. Yeah. It's not
great. It's
not great. No, it is great. What do you think has been the best piece of advice you've been given and what's been the dumbest piece of advice you've been given that you can remember?
Oh my God. Dumbest piece of advice I've ever been given. I, I think it was advice, advice. June, my creative partner and I, uh, we wrote this movie, bride Wars, and when we were pitching the movie. To the studio or something. In the very beginning, we'd never written anything in our lives and we were like so eager and we were with this like producer who we actually came to love, but he was like old school, like I'm talking in his seventies, like tanned within an inch of his life had been there, done that.
And we were like, oh my gosh. And we lived in, we lived with a couple other girls. We shared a car in LA like we were just, didn't know what was happening. And we were in the elevator about to go up to pitch the movie. And he was like talking about his pool. And we were like, pool, oh my God. Like we know someone with a pool.
We did not know one sold with a pool. So I was like, oh, I'd love to get at that pool. Like that would be great. And June's like, we'd love to come over this weekend and go to your pool. And then he says, completely, genuinely. Oh ladies, if this pitch doesn't go well, we'll never see each other again.
So it wasn't necessarily advice as it was a like, oh, this is what this business is. We're not, it's
not show friends.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. We never saw that pool even though the movie got made. Go on. Danielle. Worst
piece of advice. Not advice, but just kind of a thing that a member of my family, uh mm-hmm.
Said to me, and this isn't long ago, I had had some success as a writer. You know, some stuff bought, I wasn't, you know, like, you know, buying a house or anything yet, but I was, mm-hmm. I was, I had had some, some yeses. Some yeses, which are feel really hard to get and, um, and, but I hadn't like, made a name for myself or a real career for myself and a relative of mine Said, you know, I know you've been doing this in a while, but are we done?
Are we done? Oh, like we've done it right? We tried. Good. You know, we're done. Right. And I remember being like, what? Like, no, I don't, I'm not done. Why am I done? Yeah. But you know, it just makes you doubt yourself. Like, oh, you're right. Like you know, when you, this person who's supposed to love you and be your family is telling you you're done.
It's so upsetting. Especially because I think I was in my early thirties and had felt like I'd made some progress. It wasn't huge, but it felt like something. And so that was bad. That was good. Did that reinvigorate
you? Were you like, I'm gonna show her?
No, I think I just blocked it out for a minute. I was just like so hurt.
I was so hurt. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
That it really down, it downed me. I mean, it didn't, but I was like, I don't know what else to do. Like this is all you irrepressible though. It's just like, I don't know what else. So I'm just gonna move forward 'cause I don't know what other direction to go.
Mm-hmm.
That was probably the worst piece
of advice.
What was your best advice case? I think I've had very quickly, two best advices. One was celebrate your wins. Mm-hmm. Which is like, there's just so much. Tough things that happen. This life is so hard. And so like even if you have, like you were saying Danielle, like little yeses along the way, celebrate them.
Mm-hmm. Have a glass of wine like toast, like do you know? 'cause who knows next week what's happening, you know? Mm-hmm. And so that also just like kind of me, for me, keeps me going and like appreciative and grateful. And then the other piece of advice is much stranger, I used to go and see former presidential candidate Marian Williamson, who is a spiritual leader.
Mm-hmm. Years and years and years ago before I had really done much, she used to speak and mm-hmm. Um, guide, meditations and things like that for free. And I went and then just, and sorry if you've heard this so many times, Danielle, but a random stranger at the door as I walked in, I don't know if she was a volunteer, I don't know who she was.
Mm-hmm. As I walked in, just said to me, expect a miracle. And I was like, what? And then I started like living by it. I put it on bumper stickers for my friends, like half jokey. But truly, it's not like ask for a miracle or pray for a miracle. It's so much more active. It's just like, expect one. Mm-hmm. It's, it's just like, oh, it's coming.
Okay. I'm already in it. It's already happening. Like expect it, great things are coming. As opposed to kind of like, please let something happen for me. And it has really changed my life and kind of reframed a lot for me. Those are so nice. So from a stranger's mouth to a bumper sticker.
Yeah, from an usher's mouth, an usher who's being paid in food, obviously.
Uh, um, my advice is a little more, it's not as beautiful, honestly. They're just kind of like practical things, but they've helped me. Someone said to me, give yourself a day. To mourn any loss. Not like a life, huge loss, but a business loss. Like that part, you didn't get that job. You didn't get mm-hmm. That, that, um, show you didn't get staffed on whatever.
Give yourself a day like you, and take it, take that day, mourn that loss. You don't have to move on right away. Like if you wanted it, mourn that loss. You give yourself 24 hours and then get your ass back up. Get your ass back up. So that I give myself that time because you do need the time to mourn it. As I've gotten older, I need less time with some things because I'm like, yeah, who cares?
I know. Especially after I have
kids. I'm like, who gives off? Yeah.
So those, those times get shorter as you get older. Mm-hmm. I think. But um, but take that, take that loss, feel it, and then get over it. Um, another lot. Uh, a great piece of advice my father gave me so long ago, but I really take to heart is when you're fighting with anyone, spouse, work, friend, don't use sarcasm.
Hmm. Um, say what you wanna say or don't say it because sarcasm just leaves everybody angry and you never get out your point.
Mm-hmm.
So, say your point. If you, if you're angry about something, say it. Say it clearly. Um, and that way you are heard, um, as opposed to sarcasm where like you are just an asshole and nobody, you don't get your point out and mm-hmm.
Um, and you make that other person mad just 'cause you're being kind of a dick.
Mm-hmm.
So that's just two kind of like practical.
All good, all good advice. When you're having one of those bad days and you're mourning a loss, is there like. Where do you go to like get back, like you're, do you just let yourself land, be horizontal, Netflix and chill?
Do you have a movie you go to? Do you like run away and especially you guys with kids, like be like, all right, you and dad, peace out. I'm hiding at someone's house. Like, what do you do? It's interesting. Sometimes I actually find it is the word inner innovating where it gives you energy. Invigorating innervating, I don't know the word, but remember last
week you said den, and then I was like, that's not a real world like a, I think it's gonna read.
I'll say I actually find if it's a work loss, sometimes really nice to just drop into my kids and kind of be like, oh, this is actually where the like heartbeat of my life is. But often if it's a. You know, if have a fight with a friend or, and also some work losses. Yes. I love to get horizontal. I love to get into the Housewives.
Honestly, that's why we've come to love them, because there is no greater bomb than those monsters yelling. It's true. Yeah.
It's, there's something so relaxing about it. Like it really, it's so soothing to me, and that's shocking to people. But I will say the Housewives is a total, like when I can't count on anything, I can count on them.
I've been with a friend
whose parent passed suddenly and I went over and now we're in bed and I'm sleeping over and it's like put on the housewives. Like that is the bridge to like, what do we do right now? It is, and it's why we do the podcast. And it's why I think and, and I don't say this 'cause of us humbly, like so many people listen.
Because they are there for you, rain or shine, doing what they do. And they're, they never change. They never grow, never changed. They never learn. It's like
Groundhog Day. It's just, yeah. And it's comforting. Yeah. I so upsetting. Went through something really tough in my life and I literally could not watch tv.
And I love tv. Like I love it. I couldn't. Mm-hmm. But the only thing I could bear. Truly bear was the housewives. So that, and then also not dropping into my kids actually going the other way sometimes for, I, I like Sally field and soap dish sometimes Just take me to a mall.
Mm-hmm.
Well there's Florida.
There's Florida there. She's, you love a mall. I love a, I imagine you've been taking this Corona. Very, very, oh, been tough. I can't go to the
Sherman Oaks Galleria. I dunno what to do with myself. But I do, I have take myself to the mall. I'm not even buying anything except for, may be a wetzel pretzel, but I'm just, the smell.
The smell.
I've, I've gone to an outdoor, a wetzel, pretzel kiosk, many a time with a loss and just sat there and eaten and cried. Cinnamon sugar, cinnamon sugar. There really, sometimes
I just want the, I don't even wanna pay for it. There's always a lovely gal standing with there with them. Some shi, like small cinnamon sugar.
Oh, I
need like the whole bag of like the little ones. Yes. Oh. But you can go
back a few times and just pretend you're somebody else. You're like, oh, I didn't know. Like you just pretend put on a pair of sunglasses. I there, I'll try. I haven't been here three other times today.
Mm. Um, what are you excited about that is coming up next for you personally or professionally?
Is anything coming? Is
there
a future? A vaccine? Yeah, a vaccine. Um, excited to continue the podcast because we're lucky enough to be able to do it at home. Mm-hmm. I'm writing a book that I'm turning in. I'm so excited. About your book, Casey?
I truly, it's just kind of comedic essays, but I think people are going to, and it's not, it's not just comedic essays, it's, it's deeper than that.
And I think people are gonna really. I think people are gonna really love this. I think it's deeper and bigger than that. I'm excited. Thank you.
And yeah, I'm writing a movie and just trying to think about will we ever act again and trying to keep it tight and right here in the quarantine and do my best to get ready to get back out there.
Danielle?
Um, I am. Working on a show that's I'm finishing up on, which is really fun. I'm working for, uh, Casey's husband David on that, and that's been really fun. Um, and then, um, my writing partner and I are working on the show that we've been working on for a while and we're, which I'm very excited about.
We're super excited about that and it's something we're really passionate about and it's just, it's fun to have something that's come from your heart that you're really passionate about and feel really strongly about, and you have such a vision for it, you know what it is. I feel like that happens so rarely in my life where I know exactly what something is and so that's exciting for me to, to really see something and see what it could be and look like.
Mm-hmm. And sound like, and all that. Daughter's turning seven.
Cool, cool lady that it's fun to, that's exciting for me. Yeah.
Um, when you look back at eight year olds self, would she have ever guessed what your life is like now? Honestly, I think she'd be like disappointed I wasn't further, I was hell on wheels. I. Little Leah, Michelle, running around the neighborhood. I mean, just being honest, like my dad had built me a stage in the backyard out of just like planks of wood and I was directing neighborhood shows and firing and hiring and writing scripts and just telling people like, yeah, outta here.
You didn't learn your lines. And then taking their parts, and it was just my mom was trying to mediate and mm. So I think she'd be, uh, like Shania Twain that don't impress me much. I have a flash of her and like the whole cowgirl
outfit singing to you. Exactly. She was a, you know, the way that, that per, they, that person ran a studio, but not for long.
That's right. She did not. Yes, exactly. I remember my dad crouched in the garden and I was like, we did cats, the sequel, and I wanted fireworks to go off to finish. And I'm like, come on. He's like, oh, trying to get the fireworks to go off Jesus Christ. I know. And I was charging neighbors. They had to bring their own lawn chairs.
I think I have two versions because I think 8-year-old me just wanted to be a famous Broadway singer. And now that I know my talents, that's crazy. You know what I mean? Like I love singing, but I'm not a singer and that's disheartening. Mm-hmm. 8-year-old me would've been disappointed to find that out, but um, so she would've been disappointed that I wasn't like.
You know, on stage you have a good voice,
Danielle. You
know, but I know, like when you hear like Laura Benam ti as I, as we got to close, we're like, oh, that's a Broadway singer. Like, oh, I, I'm so misguided. Even, even in like my elder age, like when I was like, well, I'm not really a singer, but I can sell it.
And then it was like, oh, no, no, no. Um, but I do think, because sometimes I'll just stop myself, like I'll be on, I remember being on the Paramount stages. And being like, I'm fucking in the middle of Paramount and I work here. This is crazy. This is such a dream. Like mm-hmm. How did I get this dream? Like all I ever want, I loved movies so much when I was a kid.
Movies and TV and the how do you make them? I used to watch like at eight years old, like the behind the scenes of like Casablanca, you know what I mean? Like this old like Hollywood system was really interesting to me and I read everything about them. So the fact that I get to like, you know, be on those same steps and get to work in a.
Studio or movies, and I get to write something and, and then someone acts it out like it's a dream. Mm-hmm. It's a fucking dream. And so I, I, I'm very excited by that sometimes. So there's those, both those versions
mm-hmm. We ask everybody on the powerful, a podcast where you put yourself on the powerful 80 scale, zero being average everyday human, 10 being the most powerful lady that you can imagine.
Where would you rank yourselves today and on average? Oh my God,
that's a hard question.
Should we say our number at the same time, Danielle?
Okay.
Is this today? Sure answer today first. Oh God. Okay. Okay.
1, 2, 3, 4, 6.
Oh God.
Okay. I've never lacked for confidence.
I've never lacked for disbelief in myself.
Oh my God. And then on the normal day, no, it was a four day, yeah, it was a four day. I think on a normal day I can be at six.
Yeah. And I can be, I would, and I can be eight. I would a six.
Yeah. I was gonna say,
you're an eight. You think you're powerful. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I, I think I'm a six on normal day two.
When have you felt like a 10
mm in
bed? Goodnight
everybody.
I dunno if I've ever bought like a 10,
10 days. I'm definitely a 10 days. Yeah. I just don't remember one since
quarantine. Yep. Just remember one days.
Well, I've had some of those.
Yeah. God. Real
recent.
I've had flashes of 10 in my life, but yeah,
like sometimes when you get off stage. Yeah. And you like your kids tucked into bed.
You get on stage. You had a great show. You, um, your kids are good. Your kids are good. Your husband's good. You made people laugh. You mm-hmm. Talked to your family. Like you have one of those days where you like, checked all the boxes and feel great still, like, and still feel happy, like you didn't drain yourself and that you're still present in your day.
Like you gave yourself some priority too. So rare. Yeah. Yeah. That those are 10 days, I think.
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Like sometimes there's days where you're just like, oh, I landed the plane
to guys. That's a 10 like Sully.
I'm like, Sully on that. Sully
Sullenberger. Miracle on the
A miracle on the Pacific Ocean.
Yes.
Miracle on the LA
River. Miracle on the Bayou. Huh? Um, well, as we're wrapping up today, I would love to just give you guys some space to share whatever you want with everyone listening, whether it's advice, a favorite quote, like books to read, a habit that you recommend everyone have. Um, but just like final words for, you know, whoever's up to be more powerful.
What would you. What would you advise them on?
Um, I would just say find people to do it with you. Don't do it. Allow for me personally. Mm-hmm. Um, the more the merrier. Lift other people. They'll help you, um, look around for people that you like what they do. You like their vibe. You don't like, you think they're kind and you think they're smart and that they're good people and, and attach yourself to them.
Find things you can do together.
Get an assistant while you're,
that might end up being your quote, right? All of our guests have a quote, put it on that goes on my tombstone.
Please have, have your assistant put it on your Yeah. She'll it Chi just lit and then her assistant and I'll come and clean up. Yeah. And then you'll all be buried together as a, as toot in common.
Buried all his, uh,
what if I'm still alive? You are not going, would you want one of those bells I'm gonna check just in case I, I do. I've told so many people like, please make sure I'm dead. Do you? They have the science to figure it out. Now that doesn't happen. You know what? Not in today's world, we don't know what's going on and who's in charge and who, you know.
Make sure I'm dead. Alright, hold the mirror up. Make sure it fogs up. I actually do wanna be buried just to like in case. I
know
that I say Little
bell burn, burn, baby burn. Oh,
just so costly
and there again is our difference.
Yeah. I'm like, I wanna fucking mausoleum, and I'm just like, ah, burn me and leave me to the birds.
Danielle. It's too dark.
Oh my goodness. Did I ever tell you lost? This is so insane to be sharing. It's so insane. But I will leave you off this. Oh, good. Did I ever tell you, Danielle, that when we buried my mom about 15 years ago, she was not cremated. Mm-hmm. And I got into this, you know, you're in a crazy head. Space happened so suddenly I was like, I'm gonna put a bunch of stuff in the coffin.
I was putting outfits and purses and gum and cookies. Gum and cookies. And then right at the end I put a bunch of cans of coke,
so dark. And then as I was driving away, I thought. They're gonna explode all over her bone.
Oh, sorry guys. That's so sad. Casey beautiful too. It's just, oh, sorry. Love. She just really like coke. And
again,
what
if she wants coke?
And I get, can I say that? You know, I love Coke, so I get that. I really love, so
maybe I'll, I'll use that as your later fluids
set me aside. I want Coke. Original. Don't gimme Coke Zero or anything like that.
No, no. I'll make sure. Sure. It's the real thing. I want the real thing.
Mm-hmm. I want the real shit. No. Is that the powerful moves? You want it to be highlighted on this podcast? Yeah. Is this powerful ladies body? You guys, guys like, oh god, we're cutting that one end. No, it's. What I hear are powerful ladies supporting each other till the end.
Yes. That's what that is. And beyond. And beyond. And beyond. Yes. And fin and beyond, I suppose what your says. Yeah. Well, ladies, it has been a complete pleasure. Thank you for being a Yes. Thank you for sharing your evening with us to record this and thank you for sharing of all your advice and great stories.
To everyone listening, thank you for having having us.
Thanks for
having
us.
Thank you.
I am left crying and laughing, wondering who else has put food items into a casket after today's episode. These women are gems. I'm so honored that they were on the podcast. You too can have this much fun if you follow their advice. Surround yourself with great people. Create with your friends. Do. It brings you joy and of course, lean in on whatever sounds ridiculous to connect, support and follow.
Casey and Danielle. You can of course check out their podcast Bitches on Ear Wolf, uh, and then you can follow them on Instagram at Danielle Caroline Schneider and at Casey Rose Wilson. They're also on Twitter at Danielle stuff and at Casey Rose Wilson. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you've enjoyed this episode of The Powerful Ladies Podcast.
There are so many ways you can get involved and get supported with fellow powerful ladies First, subscribe to this podcast anywhere you listen to podcast. Give us a five star rating and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Follow us on Instagram at Powerful Ladies. Join the Powerful Ladies Thrive Collective.
This is the place where powerful ladies connect, level up, and learn how to thrive in business and life. Be sure to subscribe to our YouTube page, and of course, visit our website, the powerful ladies.com. I had like to thank our producer, composer, and audio engineer Jordan Duffy. Without her, this wouldn't be possible.
You can follow her on Instagram at Jordan K. Duffy. We will be back next week with a brand new episode. Until then, I hope you're taking on being powerful in your life. Go be awesome and up to something you love.
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Instagram: @daniellecarolineschneider @caseyrosewilson
Twitter: @daniellestuff @caseyrosewilson
Bitch Sesh Podcast: https://www.earwolf.com/show/bitch-sesh/
Created and hosted by Kara Duffy
Audio Engineering & Editing by Jordan Duffy
Production by Amanda Kass
Graphic design by Anna Olinova
Music by Joakim Karud
